Today, I went to visit our old apartment to check out some things. It’s been a 3 weeks since I left the place that I’ve gotten accustomed to for 11 long months. And I can’t quite put a finger at the feeling I had while I was walking along the familiar streets of the neighborhood and the safe apartment building I’ve grown to love.
For someone who’s an introvert, I am often easily saddened and taken aback by the happenings/changes in my life. It’s just like the first week in college when I was crying every night because I couldn’t let go of my “high school” and I had a hard time dealing with the fact that I wasn’t gonna spend that much time with my batchmates anymore. And it’s like the time after college when I left home to find work in Manila and I spent all those nights alone in my cousin’s house crying because I kept missing everyone back home. And not only those lifestages, but some other significant things that took place. Yes, I could be such a crybaby. Ironic when I always wanna have something new in my life and yet I always have a hard time coping up with the changes that come with it.
However, I know of a remedy known to most as the most effective one: time.
Because after some time, I get over my issues and finally move on. It’s not always easy but it happens. And it’s not always easy looking back that road again because it reminds me a lot of how I used to feel, but after much more time I realize that I’m more callused that I think I am.
Above all, it’s always comforting to know that I have a God who never changes even if I and the things I hold dear constantly do. After everything that has happened in my life, after I’ve stubbornly refused to let go of things I’ve gotten used to, and after all the good and poor decisions I’ve made, He remains faithful.
I confess that at times I unconsciously shut Him out of my life. But like the stubborn God that He also is, He just keeps pushing Himself in. So I can be a worldclass coward-childish-crybaby as much as I want but in the end what matters the most is how I’m being comforted and assured by His presence. And He’s something no amount of confusion can change.
If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!
